| estly, I don’t even know where to begin when writing this email. Three years has gone by so quickly. soon I will be back where I started but with a whole new mind frame and look. Yes, for those of you who don’t know or who don’t believe it, I did shave my head. It’s amazing!
With that said, I feel like it’s going to be mind boggling to leave Africa and just be plopped back down stateside. Not sure how I will handle it. Suppose I have the to chance, “sink or swim” and surely sink is not an option for me. I am going to miss this place, its colors or lack there of, it’s smells, the people, its friendliness; it’s over crowded taxis and lack of structure and time. Oh, so much. I have truly loved every minute even the bad times, b/c no matter where one is in life, there are always problems. Why not love?
Currently, I am cleaning out my hut, selling items outside for no more than a few American cents and packing my one 50 pd bag and 18 pound carry on. I shake my head every time I take a minute to reflect on my last three years. I haven’t a clue as to how I will explain to you all what my 3 years in Africa means. Really, so much has happened and I think I will struggle with figuring it all out. Soon, I will wake up in my old room, with my old car and even maybe the old problems of money and cell phone and too much to plan with too little time. I will miss my hut and days of endless reading on my bed. I will miss the willingness (to learn everything) of my teachers and students
Somehow, I keep telling myself I am ready for all this America, but am I really? I would say, yes. I miss a sense of normalcy and crave the comforts of home. However, will that wear off all too soon? Will I become frustrated with how America takes for granted all the things that I and many African live without?
Heading out. Will finish 2mrw…
It’s tomorrow already:
Woke this morning and I just feel like a zombie. My body is doing what it is supposed to but my brain just seems to be looking at everything from a distance. I suppose I just don’t know where all the pieces are supposed to fit. I am trying to make sense of it all, and it is so damn hard. I am trying to take mental pictures so I can recall these very footsteps months from now or even years from now…but is all this possible?
I am, yet again, at a loss for words.
It’s December 3, 2010. Christmas season at home: cold, Christmas lights, gifts, trees and snow all seem to define the holiday season for Americans. It’s not that way here at all. Totally 80-90 degree weather, lack of lights and absolutely no xmas trees, not even gifts. Christmas to Basotho is a religious holiday. They celebrate the way Americans probably did a century ago. We don’t even pass out gifts here, which I like that its not all about who got the best gift, who bought the most and who finished the earliest, however; I miss the spirit of Christmas. Why cant Americans spend Christmas like thanksgiving? Spend it with family and cherish the moments we all have together…possibly with the occasional gift (one, single, uno). On December 22nd I will be closing my service and heading to Cape Town until January 3rd. On January 3rd, I will board a plane and say goodbye (hopefully just for now) to Africa and land in NYC on Jan 4th. Will be in Mass the week of Jan 9th. Done and Done.
Once I return, Support will be needed. Oh, where will I find balance again? I hope to not fall into old habits…rat race, seems wrong! Where’s simplicity?
-Signing off for now, Tarsha Veiga |
